Parts of the Whole

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Eat This

I almost didn't sit down to write this post. Monkey has been sick for a while and today he not only woke up cranky and not feeling well, but one eye was almost swollen shut. Today is my Saturday, so I'm home with crankypants. An upset one year old is akin to a sixteen year old girl with PMS. We went from playing happily to screaming to reading quietly to screaming. If I close my eyes, I can still feel him pulling on my legs to be picked up and hear him yelling in my ear to be put down. You better believe that the second I'm done here I'm pouring myself a very very very tall glass of wine. Very tall.

One of the things that has been super challenging since becoming a domestically challenged mommy is preparing meals. Any meal. Even snacks. I've had to rely on ready made options more often than not and you know what? We're all alive and nourished. In fact, I was able to throw together a really scrumptious dinner thanks to my Ergo carrier and stuff I already had on hand. Never underestimate the power of your pantry.

  Kinda Sorta Chicken Spinach Alfredo
1 package precooked chicken strips
1 cup frozen chopped spinach
1 jar Alfredo sauce
1 regular package spaghetti
1 teaspoon minced garlic
Salt and Pepper to taste
**This is not a particularly sauce-y recipe. Have you cleaned Alfredo out of a toddler's hair lately. If you prefer more sauce, add an extra jar.**
Prepare spaghetti according to package directions. Cook spinach on medium heat in a small saucepan. Once heated through, add garlic. Add precooked chicken strips and jarred Alfredo sauce. Heat through. Combine with spaghetti.

The really epic thing about this? I got to eat this meal hot. 

Mommy made. Monkey approved.

Get used to seeing spinach in just about every recipe I make. Monkey had low iron at his nine month check up and one of the ways we're trying to up his levels is through his diet. Leafy greens are iron rich and spinach blends in to just about everything. It's like tofu. Just not. Now, where's that wine?

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Team DCG

After five years of marriage, Husband has finally caught on that if he goes and gets ice cream, it behooves him to bring me some as well. Salted Caramel Core Ben and Jerry's tonight. Now some of you may be sitting there smirking and saying to yourselves, "MY husband did that while we were dating." Good for you. And good for him for that matter. Now go on your merry LL Bean catalog life way because this blog is not for you.

Here in the DCG household, we still leave wet towels on the bed and get into arguments over who is going to load the dishwasher. We snark over who lightened the bank account last and refuse sex because it's been over a year since we've slept through the night (holy hell, what is this we business? I haven't slept through the night in over a year and I'm only slightly bitter about it). Five years of marriage and over a decade as a couple and let me tell you, I'm pretty sure we know less now than we did in our teens.

I mean shoot, we both got up every night for the six weeks Monkey slept in our room. We traded off bath time. Now we trade off who gets up and gives the monk his morning bottle. We make career changes after having long discussions with one another and make family time a priority. Husband is taking on cooking responsibilities so that on his two days home with our son he can cook. I've learned it's super important to point the penis down inside the diaper. It's like we're a team or something.

A dysfunctional team that sometimes finishes next to last and most of the time only gets the participants ribbon, but a team none the less.

Friday, December 12, 2014

Decisions, Decisions

It had crossed my mind to delete this blog. To get rid of my Facebook page for this blog. To admit defeat when it comes to being a blogger. And I think I'd be justified.

In February, it will be two years since I last wrote anything here. It's actually quite humorous that my blogging sabbatical came in correlation with my pregnancy. Yep that's right, I'm a mommy. To a human baby. We call him Monkey (like as a nickname; we gave him two middle names, that was cruel enough). We've moved a few more times and are in a house now (still renting, sorry mom). No more guinea pigs and the same dogs. Still have a personal blog filled with pictures of the Monkey. New jobs for Husband and me. I even started my own business.

With all that going on, I'd be crazy to think I could get back into the swing of blogging things. But if there's anything that motherhood has taught me (and honestly, I didn't know shizz before I became a parent), that you need a little crazy to keep you sane.

Will there still be food recipes? Probably. But you try cooking with a tiny person who thinks Mandie qualifies as a hot dog. Pinterest projects? Oh man I can't stop laughing. An honest examination of the life of someone who should have it together but doesn't? As long as you don't mind my sleep deprived rambling, then yes that's exactly what you'll find here. Will this blog look like it used to? Nope, not at all. I don't look the same after two years (thank you stretch marks and grey hair), so why would my blog? I won't promise that I won't take another long break or quit altogether or that I'll let you know if I do either. That's the beauty of blogging.

Monday, February 25, 2013

I Like Chocolate Cake

I have no words for this week. No menu, no ohmigosh I burned air, no my house is a domestic disaster (this is a big duh). None of that, just this picture:

I had bought tickets for Husband's birthday back in November. We were the second ones in line for the tickets at the casino and almost missed the start of my second 5k. Completely worth it.
Then, before the show, Husband surprised me with my little Fluffy doll...and arm bands to get into the meet and greet afterward! I had a permagrin on my face the entire night. We loved the show. The two acts that opened up for him were his friends Martiiiiiiiiiiiin! Moreno and Rick Gutierrez. Gabriel did all new stuff and some of the old. He could've been reading the constitution and we would've laughed.
It was such a wonderful night. It has been a very long time since Husband and I spent any amount of time out on the town and I'm so glad we did. Especially since we followed it up with an outing to the Seafood and Wine Festival the next day. But that's another post.

Monday, February 11, 2013

No Time to Say Hello Goodbye

The past week has been out of control crazy and this week isn't looking much better. A couple of updates:
1) Mandie is doing much better. I check her urine twice a day (she just loves peeing on a paper towel)and haven't noticed anymore red since day two of the antibiotics our fabuloso vet put her on (big shout out to Dr. Malter at Oceanlake Veterinary).
2) The biggest change for our family this week came in the form of getting rid of our non-family friendly car. Yes, that's right folks, Husband bought this undomestic diva a very domestic vehicle. A Subaru! Happy early Valentine's Day to me.
I've wanted a Subaru since I was in high school and it's all I ever talk about owning (besides a Lamborghini, dream big girls, dream big). The Mustang was supposed to be a Subaru but sometimes I let Husband have his way when he shouldn't. Either way, we are now the super stoked owners of a 2010 Subaru Impreza. Pictures as soon as she gets a bath. Oh and suggestions for names welcome.
That's it in the the what's new here category. Didn't manage to get out and walk the dogs as much as I would've like because the weather finally remembered that this is the Oregon Coast and it started to rain again. I'm aiming for five out of seven days this week. Still no running on the horizon but believe me when I do, I'm looking at all hill work.
I can't believe the amount of stuff that I need to accomplish. Between paying bills, cleaning, laundry, getting Melodie's nails cut, grocery shopping and the list that never ends, I should not be writing; however, my sanity requires me to take a moment and breath. So here I sit.
It's amazing that I even had time to cook at all. We did break our no eating out rule big time, so this week's menu isn't nearly as exciting as last week's. However, now that I have Husband on board with eating at home more (he saw how much we really did save and rather enjoyed having something for lunch too), the menus should go back to being rather complete. Here are this week's:

Kathy's Delicious Slow Cooker Chicken
Literally fall off the bone fantastic. A little prep work with getting the skin off and I didn't use a whole chicken. I used bone in chicken breast halves and they worked perfectly. Perfect Sunday dinner. 

Johnsonville Chipotle Monterey Jack Cheese Chicken Sausage Mexican Market Soup
(I'll say it here: this recipe has the dumbest name)
This was a really great soup, even if it was spicier than I would've like it. This also made a ton, so I have a big container of it in the freezer for one of those "I don't want to cook and you can't make me" days. 

Quick Tuna Casserole
This is my favorite meal to make. Super easy and I realize that it sounds like it would gross from just the ingredients, but give it a try (the recipe is below). Husband and I both love it and we know how rare that is.

Master Pizza Dough
I use this recipe for my dough when I'm in a hurry. I think I may have been trying to hurry a little too much this time, though, and didn't allow it to rise properly. Next time, Master Pizza Dough, next time.
Quick Tuna Casserole
(Adapted from, originally posted by Tresa Raymer)
Printable Version

2 packages macaroni and cheese mix
2 pouches of tuna, drained
1 can cream of mushroom soup
1 Tbl seasoned breadcrumbs

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Prepare macaroni and cheese according to directions. Stir in tuna and cream of mushroom soup. Pour mixture into greased 9x9 baking dish. Top lightly with breadcrumbs. Bake 10 to 15 minutes until bubbly. Take out of oven and try not to consume entire dish by yourself (sharing is caring).

Yes I left out the peas. Yes I doubled the recipe. Yes I want my butt to grow three sizes. Don't judge.

Well that's it for now. Off to find some motivation a.k.a. caffeine.

How do you keep sane in the midst of the hurricanes of life??

Monday, February 4, 2013

Just When You Think It's Safe to Get Back in the Water

We're already into the second month of the new year. How did that happen? It feels like just yesterday Husband was putting away the Christmas decorations (and if I had my way, it would've been yesterday).
This past week was definitely different. It was the first official week of being completely in our new home. I even meal planned for the week. We were finally settling into a routine when I noticed that something was quite right.
Our Mandie is a creature of habit and prefers sleeping in her "chair" over just about anything else (except food; girl loves her Taste of the Wild). However, the past few nights have seen me getting up in the middle of the night to let her drink and go out potty. I haven't gotten up this many times since Melodie was a puppy.
While on our walks (which I have been trying to get better about since Mandie was referred to as roly poly at her last check up), Mandie will pee every two feet. Now for dog owners, we know-this is not unusual. It's all about being top dog and peeing on someone else's territory. However, when I say every two feet, I mean literally every two feet. Waddle waddle waddle squat. Waddle waddle waddle squat (hey she's four inches off the ground, not exactly Giselle like). Today was waddle waddle waddle squat and pee blood. HOLY HECK IN A HAND BASKET!
Frantic call was made to Husband via my personal electronic leash, which of course he didn't answer. Then it was home as fast as possible, still with the waddling and the squatting. Got home called the vet, made an emergency appointment and was told we could come in early, though, to see if she could be seen. We showed up early.
Of course, Mandie was all peed out, so now she's at the vet being waited on hand and foot while this puppy momma is at home FREAKING out and trying to snuggle Melodie who just wants to play outside. The novelty of a front yard has not worn off for that one.
Instances like this make me feel like I'm going to be a terrible mother some day. I had every worse case scenario running through my head and was thinking about the horrible invasive procedures they were going to have to perform. When Mandie was taken to the back, it's quite possible I almost started crying. Worst feeling coming home without her. If we don't hear anything by two, I'm supposed to call them but I don't think I'll be able to wait until then.
So while this week showed great potential, I'm calling it as a bust. There was much cooking going on in the kitchen, though. I signed up for Pro Membership which includes a super cool meal planner. You just choose the meal you want to cook from your recipe box (which is akin to my Pinterest board in the overwhelming amount of recipes it contains) and drag it onto the menu. It automatically generates a grocery list, which I love, because without a list, I blow my grocery budget every time. Here are pictures of the recipes I made this week:

Lasagna Alfredo Roll Ups.
 I was really expecting these to be time consuming. They were not. AND even though they were overwhelmingly vegetarian, Husband ate it with no complaints (when in doubt smother it in Alfredo sauce). Keep in mind when using frozen spinach that you want to rinse it and squeeze out any extra liquid, otherwise interesting is the nicest way to describe the way it tastes. I also sauteed some garlic in with my spinach because, well, I heart garlic.

Taco Pie.
 Again, another super easy recipe but I had to make quite a few modifications which I'll list below.

A-Maize-Ing Corn Chowder
Surprisingly, while Husband enjoys corn, he doesn't care for soup, so this wasn't a huge hit, except for the bacon on top. I, however, thoroughly enjoyed it and can't think of any changes that I made to it.

Baked Chicken
This was quite easily the yummiest meal of the week. Full of flavor and fat, I would totally make it again, but only after a really really really long run.

Crescent Pizza Pockets
Meh, not sure I'd made these again. Great idea but the proportions of ingredients to the directions was off. Tasty, but a bit aggravating.
Taco Pie
(Adapted from, originally posted by Stephanie)
Printable Version

1 package refrigerated crescent rolls
1 lb ground turkey
1/2 large onion minced
1 package taco seasoning mix
1 minced clove garlic
8 oz. sour cream
1/2 can refried beans
8 oz colby jack cheese
1 cup crushed tortilla chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lay crescent dough flat on the bottom of a square cake pan and bake according to package directions. DO NOT UNDER BAKE. Meanwhile, brown the ground turkey and saute onions together in a large skillet over medium high heat. Add the taco seasoning and stir together well. In separate bowl, mix sour cream and refried beans together. When dough is done, remove from oven and place meat mixture on top, then layer with sour cream and refried beans and cheese, and then top off with the crushed nacho chips. Return to oven and bake at 350 degrees F (175 degrees C) for 10 minutes, or until cheese has melted.

Well that's what's happening around these parts. I want to hear from you now. How did your week go?

Monday, January 28, 2013

Stop and Go

Well I'm not even sure where to begin. Our scenery has completely changed. At the beginning of this month, we made the move from apartment to house. Still renting, but I enjoy that someone else is footing the bill to replace our exhaust fan and fix our kitchen light. The girls are enjoying have a yard and lots of square footage to sniff. Also, Melodie has become a fireplace whore. Husband is enjoying having a basement office (and let's not kid, so am I; anything to do with cable and been banned on the main floor). I'm not sure what I enjoy most, it's kind of a whole package thing for me.

We finished cleaning the apartment on Saturday (just the carpets, everything else was scrubbed to within an inch of it's life last Sunday). I have never been so happy to be done with a place. When we left our apartment in California, I was sad because we had such great experiences there. With the apartment here, I knew we should have run away screaming when the very first day we were there (less than 24 hours), we had water coming in through the bathroom ceiling fan.

Now, the girls can have crazy zoomies and I don't have to worry about the people underneath. Also, we have a real couch now and my back has never been more grateful.

Where does that leave me and the blog you ask? Why has it been so badly neglected that the number of cobwebs make it look like the Munsters moved in? Glad you asked.

Every since I started blogging, I've struggled with finding a balance between it and real life. I tend to have obsessive tendencies and miss out on things. In an attempt to maintain doing what I love (posting here) and doing what is necessary (apparently it's frowned up to let dogs walk themselves), I will only be posting once a week. My hope is that by only posting once a week, I will be able to produce quality work that someone would actually want to read.

I'm editing my post to add that while I feel like I completely personify The Undomestic Goddess, it drives me bananas that my name doesn't match my url. Since I have no desire to pay for a web address or switch platforms to find one that will allow me to be the Undomestic Goddess, I've decided to create a huge headache for myself and match everything to be Domestically Challenged Grrl. Oh what fresh hell I've stepped in.

So, here's to the new year and whatever it may bring (as long as it's alcohol)!